If you have been associated in either therapy or counselling, or spirituality and meditation, in the latest yrs you have most likely encountered two essential, polarized viewpoints concerning personality. Basically it amounts to this: therapists are professional-identity (and its improvement through healing neurosis and so on.) while spiritual academics proclaim temperament a massive waste of time, due to the fact neurotic or not, you are far more than your individuality.
This is not specially shocking, given that therapy and counseling have a tendency to be worried with the person, though religious tactics are concerned with larger matters. But it does lead the novices and inexperienced persons into a quandary in which they are faced with the conclusion of what to do about individuality. On the a single hand, remedy could be an costly, futile exertion to greater the temperament, while, on the other hand, religious observe may well offer an excuse to depart personalized problems behind, with the justification that you are transferring on to far more lofty considerations.
In the substantial time I have been engaged in treatment and spirituality I can say that I have found out the reply to this controversy! And I will not say it with no reluctance and a certain caution, due to the fact my remedy is liable to offend both of those camps — therapists and religious instructors. Possibly my respond to is a lot less a rejection or abandonment of one particular viewpoint for a further and extra of a synthesis. This may perhaps be an remedy of the most effective type – the variety that does not marginalize or dismiss anyone’s expertise or viewpoint. For my reply, when radically new and impressive, does not essentially disagree with possibly level of view, but considers every single acceptable to the complicated, total unfolding procedure of our human nature and opportunity.
My solution to the dilemma is to propose a third band of human expertise. I simply call this “the reliable self” and considering the fact that I am not utilizing any strange words and phrases I need to define this expression, mainly because I do indicate one thing certain. The genuine self, in the way I use the expression, is the bridge between the personality and the non secular self. It is arrived at commonly, but not generally, soon after a prolonged time period of intense, deep, applied and dependable interior do the job. This inner work is made up of a journey of self-discovery in which a single circumvents the self, getting to be progressively conscious of the acutely aware and unconscious materials that contains one’s perception of self, or ego. This will involve character, which is primarily defensive technique or an smart, protecting reaction to early conditioning, which gets to be ever more calcified and adapted throughout adolescence and grownup existence. Character is composed of the way in which we survive and shield ourselves from interior and outer stimuli and in the long run steer clear of really conference daily life. It results in a self-imposed jail — limitations in which we come to feel falsely harmless.
Self-discovery also requires cultivating our awareness of temperament, or the way in which character (defenses and procedures) is skilled. Both inwardly and outwardly we erect a barrier to experience — lifetime functions and other folks — which is a mask, façade or persona which eclipses the genuine particular person, or our genuine character.
We also elevate psychological and behavioural designs out of the murky stratum of the unconscious, out of unawareness, and see just how a great deal our daily life is lived quickly, as an automaton without the need of authentic human reaction, emotional feeling, resonance, empathy or even consciousness.
The method of self-discovery involves witnessing, reliving and remembering, training awareness and releasing pent-up feelings, returning the bodymind, as a result of self-regulating, self-healing and self-referral, to a normal state of balance, simplicity and relaxation, and opening to perception and working experience. In the small-phrase the working experience is enriching, enlivening and comprehensive of dramatic changes. In the extended-time period as a result of obtaining own wholeness, soul nourishment and insights we achieve a threshold, a bridge, a chasm – all variously transitional metaphors that signify a quantum leap, a fourth dimensional modify that I have termed “the threshold of transformation”.
The significance of this threshold, and what distinguishes it from all the variations that have absent just before, is that is results are irreversible — it is a stage from which there is no likely back. As soon as taken, this move across the threshold will direct you to the problem of authenticity and intimacy with your very own real character.
This insight renders the controversy about personality redundant. But it does depend on our capability to obviously distinguish the psychological from the non secular.